Becoming A Better Man
by Israfel.R
Summary: Dave understands what he has done was wrong, pushing Kurt away is driving him crazy. He finally breaks, telling his family his secret, and all he wants now is another chance with Kurt.


A/N: ugh, I know I should continue writing my other stories but… writers block… So, I start another with my favorite pairing in the world. At first writing this I was going to make it a suicide attempt since I feel like poop but then I was like "Ugh, I shouldn't cause so many character deaths cause I'm emo..."

Also, future chappies will be in FB form (mostly cause it looks fun when others do it… and Kurt is now far away…)

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Kurt is gone.

There's no way I can tell him I am sorry for everything, there's no way I can just go up to him and plead for him to come back to McKinley so I can see his face every day without him freaking out I'm gonna kill him. It was a slip of the tongue when I told him I was gonna kill him! I panicked, no duh, but I didn't mean it! I would never hurt him like that.

But now it doesn't matter.

My father is hugely disappointed in me, as my grades continue to fall from As to Ds. He never yells, always going me firm stares of disappointment. He tells me with a stern voice that even if Kurt is different that it's God's law to love the sinner. How ironic is that though? Love the sinner but hate the sin, I feel something for Kurt that no normal Christian boy should feel for another guy.

On Friday night of that week, my parents take me to church to prey over me for my problems. He pastor tells me that while I am wrong to hurt that boy, it would not matter since he will go to hell for being a homosexual. I begin to panic once more, my hands sweating as the pastor anoints me with oil, pushing my head back as if he is trying to snap it while he preys in a weird language. I try to hold back my tears as they keep saying horrible things about Kurt; like it is his fault that I am like this, that he cause me to hurt him since he is a huge sinner.

On Sunday, the pastor talks about keeping God's laws. How the world is sinning by accepting the gay marriage. I keep my head down, so the pastor doesn't see the rage coming out of me. I stare at the carpet hoping that God will save me from this place so I don't have to be reminded how much of a sinner I am. My mother jabs me with her arms, growling at me to pay attention as she forces me to sit up and listen to the sermon. I glance around, noticing my mother takes in every word the pastor says as my father studies his bible.

I feel trapped in a world where I don't belong, that these people will spite me for just being in the same room as them, pulling out the bibles and holy water to pray over me and do some form of exorcism.

At home all I can do is watch sports channels and hope for the best I'm a normal son, but all I can think about is Kurt. Things I will do to him if I ever get the chance. Things like hugging him, kissing him, and just taking him on midnight walks under the star light sky. Hell, I'll watch musicals with him and chick flicks.

Monday morning, I just make my way out of my mother's car as she calls out a "God Bless you." I don't shove any geeks in my way, I don't make eye contact with any of the Glee members and I don't even sit with my suppose friends during lunch. I wonder the empty halls, always coming to Kurt's locker as I stare at it, hoping he will come back but i know he will not, but deep down I just hope he can so I can ask for my second chance.

Once back home, I sit in the living room watching some crap show about God, how we are all sinners. My mother listens like her life depends on it, which in a sense it does, while my father reads the paper. I take a deep sigh as they bring up Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy. I roll my eyes as they say such crap on how these men and woman should not right for their country. I let out a groan as they talk about these people like they do not deserve to live.

My mother gives me a stern glare, asking me what is wrong with me. I roll my eyes saying nothing, but she catches the lie and demands it from me.

It must have been the final straw as I glare back at her, "I have a problem with these so-called Christians hating people." I hiss out, she looks a bit shock. "We are supposed to love others for everything but we hate the gays! Why? This is like the whole idea of African-Americans cannot get married or join the army! What is next? All throughout the Christian history, they just hate everyone. I did nothing wrong! It's not my fault I like men instead of woman! God made me this way! I'm not hurting anyone!" My mother slaps me, screaming that she will not stand having a faggot in her house. She screams like a banshee telling memo get out of the house, that she never wants to see my face her again. My father is shock as do I. I stand at full height gathering all that is felt of my self-esteem and confidence, while hating my mother more than ever, I then just take my leave.

Running out of the house as far as my legs can take me, which brings me to Azimio's home. Knocking on the door, I wait for my friend to open up as he frowns out me but let's me in. "Dude, you look like shit."

"You would too if you told your Christian loving family that you're gay." I say with full on sarcasm.

"Wait... You're gay?" He frowns, staring at me. I nod meekly, knowing I am probably going to lose my only friend but he just shrugs. "Whatever. So, they kicked you out? Need a place to crash?"

I smile, "Yeah, man. Can I use your PC for a few minutes?"

He shrugs, making his way to his room as I closely follow.

Logging into face book, I search Kurt's name, seeing a profile picture of him and that other cute guy. I send him a message with the title:

**Becoming A Better Man**

_I hope you didn't delete this knowing it's from me, but if you didn't great! If you did... Well_ _waste of time I guess._

_I came out to my parents and my mother kicked me out, screaming about something or another about going to hell and whatnot. Mostly cause I defended the gays on the DADT policy and marriage. My father didn't react at all but I'm right to assume he is on her side since he always is._

_Anyways, I just want you to know I'm really sorry for what I have done to know. I just hated you cause you can be so free with yourself and have friends who love you. But I love that about you too, the air of confidence always stood around you even when I mocked you or shove you. Also, I want to point out that I didn't mean about hurting you if you told anyone, I had those gay panic moments. _

_Oh, I told __Azimio__ and he's cool win me being gay, though I highly doubt the others will be as friendly. _

_So... I guess that's it. I don't want to ramble and rant about life if you're not gonna read this but if you do... I hope we can be friends. If not, maybe just FB friends?_

_-D_

Logging off Facebook I turn to see Azimio holding out his Xbox remote to me with a grin. "So, to get your mind off all the shit, as a professional I would have to say about twelve hours of Black Ops will make you feel better and some of my ma's friend chicken."

He holds out his fist as I bump his with my own. "I will take your professional advice then, Doc."

Into five hours of killing sprees with no calls from my mother or father wonder where I am, Azimio's mom gets the story from my friend as she frowns and hugs me telling me it's gonna be fine.

Honestly, I'm not sure why I was scared to come out. Azimio's family is a lot better than my own. Maybe coming out to school wouldn't be so hard either?

Checking my facebook after dinner I see a friend request from Kurt. Smiling, I accept without a second thought.

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A/N: Am I right to assume Azimio is his last name? Lol PLEASE REVIEW! THANKS! LOVE YA!


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